What if you met an angel (the angel of death), broad minded and meant to be grey haired pretty, who straight on pushes you to the edge, much more closer to the achromatic age with skin to blood communication. Sure, once upon every time, a young gun thought of engaging such fair whole, it wouldn't be just a scintillating test for you but a bone deep haunting gore, awakening your inner weird entity from nothing, to something and swiftly into oblivion.
Yes mainly because of great physical pain
No longer have any experience
To be born free is an accident; To live free a responsibility; To die free is an obligation and there is a remedy for everything; it is called death.